Dessie Roberta (Parks) Stephenson, the 8th child of Julius and Belva (Findley) Parks, was born May 22, 1919, at the family home in Commanche County, southeast of Coldwater, Kansas. Her family came from sturdy pioneer stock; her grandfather having drove a mess wagon for George Custer's survey crew when surveying the western United States prior to settlement. Her parents moved from St. John, Kansas looking for farmland and a better way of life. Sisters Dorothy, twins Verda and Vella, brothers Buck, Dick, Jack and Pete welcomed sister Dessie. Two more brothers, Martin and Rex came several years later. Dessie grew up on the family farm doing all the chores farm kids do. She attended school at "TinTop" then High School in Coldwater where she played basketball and was a 4-H member.

Her parents, not having the opportunity for much schooling, encouraged all their children to pursue their educational endeavors. She began college at Northwestern Teachers College at Alva, Oklahoma, to become a lab technician. She was the only female in most of her science classes. But most of her classmates were farm boys and accepted. She always said "every time I slop the hogs, I think I have all the equal rights I want!"

Dessie loved flying and was one of two women accepted into the Women's Ferrying Service in 1939, but her letter of acceptance was mailed to her parents home address. Only years later, did they tell her of its arrival. They were so afraid, already having one daughter, four sons and two sons-in-law enlisted.

In 1939, Dessie went home with a college friend, Ruth DeMoss, from Webb, Oklahoma. Not wanting to miss a date with her boyfriend, Loyd Hoyt she tried to make a blind date with a neighbor boy for Dessie, but he (Howard) was not to be persuaded. However, after having seen her at church on Sunday, they all went to the Epperly's where Loyd was boarding, and he fixed lunch for all. They were, of course, chaperoned by his younger sister and husband, Doris and Woodrow Gore. During the 1940's Howard began making many trips to Alva and Coldwater while the sounds of war rumbled in Europe. Howard suffered many pranks from all Dessie's brothers, but he still kept coming back. He was drafted January of 1941, but was discharged in late fall because of his age and the need for farmers going into a war. He had "popped the question" and she said "yes". So with the help of his brother-in-law, Albert Meyer, they hurridly built a home on the Virgil Lawson place he had purchased early just north of his parents home place.
After Pearl Harbor was attacked, fearing he would be recalled, they changed their wedding date to December 20, 1941. Dessie's brother Dick and a college friend (and later sister-in-law) Georgia Ferguson served as witnesses. With wedding gifts, like heifers, laying hens, and a cellar full of fruits and vegetables, they were ready for life on the farm. Brother Buck had taught her how to make gravy. They established their home northeast of Webb, where they raised cattle, wheat, broomcorn, cotton, and 5 children: Elin Rose, Lance Parke, Nelda Marie, Kirk Fred, and Belva Ann. Dessie was a stay-at-home mom, cooking 3 meals a day, washing dishes and clothes by hand; milking cows twice a day, also by hand. Later a milking machine was added to allow more time in the fields! haha
Dessie was converted as a young college girl. She was musically inclined, so she put her talents to good use at her new church nestled in the blackjacks. She instilled this love of music in her children. We had a piano which she and all her girls then learned to play. All the kids sing and play some instrument. She never missed the "Lawrence Welk Show" on Saturday nights. Dessie was not one to waste time. If she ever sat down she was either milking, reading, embroidering or crocheting rugs for the floors.

Dessie and Howard were good stewards of the land, very concerned about soil erosion, and were one of the first to build terraces and pond dams. Having married a farmer/rancher, Dessie got to do the outdoor things that meant so much to her: riding horses and working with cattle. However, cotton was never her "cup of tea"! This love of the land and way of life was handed from their parents that also thought this was a great way to live and raise a family. Bible study was a part of their daily lives. Their hearts and home were open to missionaries and visiting preachers. All those ministry students Hillsdale all went back to college with a tank full of gas and I'll bet twenty dollar bill for expenses. One of the highlights of their lives was a trip to the Holy Land in 1976 to see where their Savior had walked.

Money was tight in their early married lives, but in later years, after practicing good stewardship (and a little oil well), they took several trips, mostly farm tours. They were generous, possessing a gentle and compassionate nature and helped their children and especially their grandchildren, sending most of them to college as well as emergencies in their extended families. Did I mention Dessie and Howard accepted their sons- and daughters-in law as their own? And their love was returned in large measure. Children flocked to Dessie like ducks to water. There was generally one or two in tow at all times. Although she was not a demonstrative person, she exhibited pleasure in the small contentments of home and family. For her 50th school reunion, when asked to write a capsule of her life, she wrote of her college, marriage, children, farm life, etc. Quote "Life has not been boring. It has been a full life, and I've been much happier than I deserved. Through the years I have learned to believe and trust in my Lord and Savior. I am glad to say like Joshua of old, 'As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord'. In recalling the events of the last 50 years, I must say the good times far outnumbered the lousy times".

In their later years you never saw them but what they weren't together, which usually meant he needed gates opened. But as we came to realize, Howard was having several health issues. Dessie cared for him faithfully "til death did they part" in Feburary 1997. She continued to live on the farm with the very able and supportive help of the Mike Guerrero family who had been doing the farming and keeping an eye out for them for years. Macular Degeneration robbed of her eyesite. She made her home with Elin at her old homestead for several years and was happy helping with household and cooking chores when she could. Once again she feed the chickens and gathered the eggs. The stairs got to be too much so she came to live with Belva. Belva didn't have chickens, but she never had to wash dishes or do laundry again! She did keep telling mama that she was spoiling her boys by even ironing their T-shirts.

Dessie has celebrated her birthdays since 1980 amongst family, friends and neighbors at the Webb Reunion, which her kids started for her 80th birthday.

Dessie has seen many changes in her live time from riding horse back to airplanes; crank and holler phones to wireless communication; satellites, man on the moon, indoor plumbing, electricity etc. Dessie is an extremely kind, soft spoken lady. She has earned the everyday luxuries most of us take for granted. She earned the right to relax and retire, but knowing her, I'm sure she would rather be up milking the cows and feeding the chickens if she could. Hard times, drought, lack of finances, hard work and a strong sense of family and responsibility are traits that have made and developed her character over the years.

Dessie was preceded in death by her parents, Julius and Belva Parks, three sisters, Dorothy, Vella and Verda; six brothers, Buck, Dick, Jack, Pete, Martin and Rex and their spouses. She was the last remaining member of her family. Husband Howard preceded her in 1997, followed by gdson-in-law Charlie Whitmarsh, great-gdson, Jesse Rae Mabra and granddaughter Lana Whitmarsh Ramsey. She was also the last remaining member of her husband's family.

Dessie is survived by daughter Elin Bryant and husband Don of Coldwater, Kansas, son Lance Stephenson and wife Jeannie of Webb, Oklahoma, daughter Nelda Crispin and husband Chris of Putnam, Oklahoma, son Kirk Stephenson and wife Louise of Webb, Oklahoma, daughter Belva Mabra and husband Allen of Woodward, Oklahoma. Nine granddchildren as well as the rest of the community came to call them Granny and Papa. Cara and husband Greg, Stephen, Neal and wife Monica, Lana's husband Demspey, Fred and wife Amy, Kim and husband Eric, Jason and wife Sarah, Clayton and wife Amanda and Ben. Eighteen great-grandchildren Tessa, Brandon, Desiree, Brant, Katie, Lyle, Miah, Jack, Luke, Hope, Emily, Silas, Nolan, Autumn, Marshall, Triniti and Gracie. Three great great-granddchildren Ryan, Cash and Sophia, as well as many nieces, nephews and friends who are expecting to join her, the rest of the Saints and our Savior soon.