Howard Ray Bentley

Howard Ray Bentley was born on September 2, 1935, in Webb, Oklahoma, to George Oda Bentley and Anna Maude (Evans) Bentley. He spent his early years growing up in Vici, Oklahoma, where he formed the roots of a life defined by hard work, quiet kindness, and deep devotion to family.

Howard attended the Sulphur School for the Deaf, where he completed his education from grade school through high school. After graduating, he joined the harvest crews and often fondly remembered those days, especially a memorable trip to Canada. Those early experiences shaped his strong work ethic and appreciation for the simple joys of travel and friendship.

Howard later returned to Vici, where he met Irene Cole at a dance. Their meeting marked the beginning of a love story that would last for decades. The two married and together ran a dairy farm in Vici, building both a livelihood and a home filled with warmth and laughter. Following Irene’s passing, Howard moved to Shattuck, Oklahoma.

When Howard married Irene—known lovingly as “Granny”—he instantly became a grandfather to seven grandchildren, a number that eventually grew to thirteen. From the very beginning, he loved them deeply and was loved just as strongly in return. Howard was always kind and patient, even when the house was full, with grandchildren lined up for the bathroom or sleeping on the couch.

Saturday nights at the farm became treasured traditions. Frozen pizzas, laughter, and evenings spent watching Sonny & Cher, The Dukes of Hazzard, and The Incredible Hulk created memories that would last a lifetime. Whether he was playing cards, teaching sign language, protecting the kids from scorpions, or standing watch outside the cellar during a storm, Howard had a way of making every grandchild feel safe, loved, and welcome.

His love extended just as deeply to the great-grandchildren. Trips to the yellow house were always greeted with warm hugs and Howard’s familiar, gentle smile—one that spoke volumes about how happy he was to see them.

The grandchildren he cherished include Merlene Moss’s children: Marilyn, Denise, Gayla, Kendall, Melody, Aaron, and Krista; Dale Cole’s daughter, Sandy; Marva Salisbury’s daughters: Shannon, Sharolyn, and Sharla; and Leland Cole’s children: Cary and Chad.

Although Howard was easygoing and welcoming with visitors, he believed in doing a job right. Those who worked alongside him remember his careful attention to detail on projects such as building fences and constructing storerooms. One grandson recalls Granny sharing that Howard’s teachers once told their deaf students they would need to do better work than others because of their disability. Howard took that lesson to heart and proved it throughout his life.

Many of the grandchildren treasure handmade items Howard crafted from cedar on the farm—“tater boxes,” picture frames, and other pieces that remain cherished keepsakes and lasting reminders of his care and skill.

Perhaps the greatest lesson Howard and Irene shared was their example of devotion to one another. From Irene fixing his favorite supper—a bologna sandwich with chips and a Coke—to Howard’s tender care for her as her memory faded, their marriage showed their family what true love looks like. One grandchild estimated they must have danced a million miles together since the night they met.

Howard enjoyed dancing, fishing, traveling with Irene, gathering with family, and spending evenings playing cards and dominoes. Even later in life, his gentle spirit and warm smile continued to brighten the lives of those around him. In 2026, he was honored as the Valentine’s Day King at the Shattuck Nursing Home.

Howard was preceded in death by his parents, George Oda Bentley and Anna Maude Bentley; his beloved wife, Irene; and many other loved ones.

He is survived by his sister, Eunice Starbuck; his stepdaughter, Marva Salisbury; his stepson, Leland Cole; his many grandchildren and great-grandchildren; and numerous nieces, nephews, relatives, and friends who will cherish his memory.

Howard will be remembered for his quiet strength, patient kindness, skilled hands, and the deep love he shared with his family. His legacy lives on in the memories he created, the lessons he taught, and the many lives he touched.

Memorial donations may be made to the
Oklahoma School for the Deaf in Sulphur, OK
c/o Shaw Funeral Home
P.O. Box 276
Vici, OK 73859.